I really like the advice at the end there. I've struggled with the review angle myself with my books.

As a result, I don't have many on Amazon, lol or GoodReads (which to me seems a little toxic).

For my first book, I got lucky in that Publishers Weekly did a review on it without solicitation. I had already gone ahead with the Kirkus thing, but I was nervous about that because I've read they can just as easily give a sour review as not, in which case, when you receive the review, you have the option of not publishing it on their site. Luckily, mine was good, as was the PW review.

That gave me confidence to solicit from a few other review sites like BookTrib and Feathered Quill. For a small fee, like Kirkus, they'll review your book, too. I can't remember if you can ask them not to publish bad reviews. What is fun about these reviews is seeing someone's interpretation of your story. Sometimes, it's surprising how people respond.

I also submitted to one contest, one sponsored by Feathered Quill, where it was a 2023 Finalist for the Teen category. I would have preferred to have won outright, lol, but I'll take what I can get.

They say that a book has to break through in the first year, but I have seen plenty of books break through past the first year, so I'm soldiering on. It has sold more in the last 5 months than it sold in the first two years, so I simply don't buy that myth.

I don't solicit reviews from individual reviewers. That may be a mistake, but I'm a little too empathic for my own good for the reasons you cited.

One thing I will say is that I've had a number of reviewers ask for review copies and they've never reviewed it after I send them the copy.

I find that annoying and a bit insulting. If I send a printed copy at the request of someone, which costs me postage and cost of the book, it seems fair to expect a review in exchange.

Finally, Katharine Valentino here on Medium has a pub for folks to review each other's books here:

https://medium.com/free-amazon-book-reviews-for-your-featured-book